In the course of a relationship, everyone encounters a situation where their significant other is suddenly cold to them.

Before when we chat together, how to chat can not chat enough. But gradually it became cold as ice, not actively looking for their own chat, chatting is not so enthusiastic.

You are full of bitterness to find their own buddies and girlfriends to vomit, the harvest of the vast majority of the answer is this: “He does not love you, break up.”

But is that really true?

1
Why do you get cold feet

In a romantic relationship, there is a very important element

It’s called comfort distance.

At the beginning of the hot love, the two people can chat about a little thing until two or three o’clock in the middle of the night, drink a coffee two people with a cup, can not wait to get tired of every day together, this is called the passion zone.

This type of relationship is caused by an explosion of good feelings for each other, resulting in extreme intimacy.

But this usually doesn’t last long.

After the period of passion one goes into the comfort zone, after all one cannot live in passion for the rest of one’s life.

This happens because one partner has stepped into the comfort zone while the other is still in the passion zone and hasn’t come out.

Sensitive people will find that before the person is still warmly asked me: eat? How much are you wearing? Did you sleep? Tired? Such questions, suddenly do not care about me.

In fact, after the passion fades, everyone is the same, they will focus from the subjective emotional issues, transferred to the more intuitive reality.

At this time, if you don’t go to ask each other about the details of life, but keep asking for intimacy, then it is bound to confuse the other party.

2
How to deal with coldness

First of all, the most taboo is to use extreme “poison to fight poison” way to solve the problem.

The so-called poison to fight poison, that is, he is cold to me, I am more cold to him.

When the other half into the comfort zone, you feel his “cold”. The other half is in his comfort zone, and you feel his “coldness”. Holding the mood of gambling and his tit for tat, when I look for you, you ignore me, then when you come to me, I also ignore you.

One of the easy results of such an approach is that your significant other experiences your mood swings and knows that you are a person who likes to beg him to coax you by being cold.

It may seem like you’ve achieved your goal, but in reality, the choice of coaxing or not is his, in other words, you’ve personally handed over the initiative in the relationship to the other person.

He can choose to take the initiative to coax you, or he can choose to go with the flow, you ignore me, then break up.

The right thing to do is to maintain a healthy state of mind, how to do still how to do, just from time to time to let the other person know the state of their lives, to put it bluntly is to find a proper balance between enthusiasm and coldness.

At this time your enthusiasm and initiative seems to be giving, but in fact it is taking. You expect to get the same enthusiasm from the other person through your own contribution. In this mood, once you fail to live up to the expectation, it will inevitably bring negative emotions.

At this stage, you need to show the state is: to maintain a certain phone call and WeChat greetings, so that the other party knows that you have him in mind, but it is not indispensable to him.

3
The coldness of the suitor

There is another situation where two people are not yet in love. One party is pursuing the other, and after keeping a fierce pursuit for a period of time, it suddenly goes quiet.

Many girls wonder, I obviously didn’t reject him, why did he just ignore me?

Girl ah, you have to know, chasing girls this matter, in the eyes of the boys can not see the progress, if you can let him experience your mood he will of course try, but chasing you and not like a computer to transfer files, there is so a progress bar. Visible and touchable.

He doesn’t know what’s going on in your heart, and the feedback you’re giving him is not enough to support him in his pursuit, so of course he chooses to let it go.

Of course, you have to understand what it means to “chase”.

If a boy says good morning to you in the morning, says good night to you in the evening, and chats with you whenever he has time, is he chasing you?

Not necessarily, because he does all these things, for another girl, can be, he may just looking for someone to pass the time of boredom is just.

You shouldn’t think he’s cold to you just because he’s suddenly not checking in with you and talking to you less. The harsh reality may be: he’s not hot at all.

So girls, don’t be impressed by these superficialities, and guys shouldn’t use these common behaviours to show affection to a girl.

If you really want to chase someone, you must throw yourself at them, not generalise these universally applicable bridges.

4
Chill out in chat

In chatting, you need to work on your skills of reading people’s words.

If there are a lot of “ums”, “huhs”, “ohs”, “okay” phrases in your conversations, you need to be more aware of what’s going on in your conversation. Phrases, you need to consider his attitude towards you.

Because the dialogue between normal couples, if these contents appear too often, then it shows that the relationship between the two of you appeared a certain problem.

There are various reasons behind the coldness between the sexes, and one must think twice before making a decision.

You can not turn a blind eye, can not blindly to cold cooling, and can not roughly break up the matter.

Encountered such a small setback to give up the relationship, then what kind of lover, it is difficult to make a success with you.